Need Your Ducks in a Row? Not Necessarily.

Are you the type of person who feels they need all to be perfect in order to take action?  Anxious individuals often feel the more “lined up”things are the less chance there is for something unplanned to occur. Anxious and stressed people typically hate unplanned because it can be so uncomfortable not knowing what is coming next around the corner.

These individuals also feel if something is not done in an exact way it’s less important or less effective.  It’s a very black and white way of looking at situations and it sets yourself up for increasing anxiety symptoms.  When you look at things as absolutes you put a lot of pressure on yourself and the outcome of your circumstances.

As we all know, having a plan is good and is often very beneficial.  It’s actually one of the components I cover through my coaching.  Having a plan prioritizes what you want and need out of life.

However, if you’re well versed in the “planned” side of life, I would suggest you start having fun living in the unplanned.  In other words, don’t be fearful of taking action when all your ducks aren’t lined up in row.Try taking comfort in the unknown.

Send a comment about something you’ve recently done that forced you to step off your usual path!

Others Regularly Incorporate Exercise Into Their Routine, And So Can You

Getting in shape ranks right up there with the most popular resolutions we make to ourselves.  Pretty much everyone wants to lose a few pounds, become more fit, look better and feel better.  As an added benefit, regular physical activity certainly helps us manage stress better.

We have the best intention, we want to get in better shape, but most of us wane in our regimen about a month into it. You would think it’s the motivation to get started that’s so difficult, but it’s the lack of consistent follow through that gets the best of most people.

Believe it or not, there are those individuals who are not only able to begin an exercise regimen, they are able to make it more than a few week fad.  They stick with it month after month, year after year, and end up with the best and most lasting results.

So how do they do it?  How do they stay so committed?

Following are five ways chronic exercisers help keep themselves on the road to fitness.

  1. THEY MAKE A VERBAL COMMITMENT WITH THEMSELVES TO BEGIN EXERCISING AND TO STOP THE EXCUSES. Write your commitment down on a post it note and put it somewhere you go often as a constant reminder. Think of how much time you can devote to exercise each day. Be honest with yourself. Now say it out loud to yourself and make it a hard fast rule you will stick to no matter what.
  2. THEY SET THEIR CLOCK. If you’re going to exercise first thing in the morning, then make sure you set your alarm the night before.  Set the schedule before you go to sleep and prepare your mind for your exercise routine the following day.

A word of caution, if you’re like me and love the snooze button, be sure to keep your phone out of reach. Before I go to bed I often have to toss my phone across the room so there is no way I can reach out and delay the alarm the next morning.  By the time I get out of bed to get to the phone, I am able to convince myself to stay up, get dressed and go exercise.’

3 THEY FIND EXERCISES THAT FIT THEIR LIFESTYLE. There are so many different types of effective exercises out there that appeal to any number of people. Find one that looks interesting and FUN and that is also accessible.  For example, new moms will find they are much more likely to exercise if it’s one in which they can bring their baby.  Going out for a walk using the stroller or doing some mother-baby yoga classes are two ways you can accomplish two things simultaneously.

The better the exercise assimilates into your day to day routine, the greater the likelihood you will be consistent.  The more you enjoy your exercise,the greater your chances of long-term success.

4  THEY WRITE IT DOWN.  Be sure to keep a log of what you do.  As time goes on you will be able to see in the form of numbers how you have improved in strength, endurance and flexibility.  You will have a reminder of how far you’ve come, and also how much more you want to accomplish.  It’s a wonderful motivator and keeps you wanting to challenge yourself even more.

5  THEY REWARD THEMSELVES. It is extremely encouraging to cheerlead yourself along your road to fitness.  Congratulate yourself every time you are through, and even if it wasn’t the best workout, give yourself a pat on the back for showing up.  Those days when you are tired, resist the temptation to talk yourself out of your exercise routine for fear of not being able to have your most effective workout.  Remember, a less than perfect workout is MUCH BETTER than no workout at all.

Reward yourself with something you really like such as new clothes, a massage, a movie, whatever it is that gives you the sense of a job well done.  It also helps to put some type of marker on your calendar each day you complete your routine.  At the end of the month when you look back at all the days you persevered and did it you can’t help but feel a sense of accomplishment.

Trust YOU

“Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that iron string.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson, Self-Reliance

After working with thousands of individuals living with stress and anxiety, I have seen how each person’s strength has helped them realize their most effective and long-lasting relief from these symptoms.  I have witnessed Moms and Dads, college students, and the elderly, people just starting out their career, and others in the midst of a career change, all find that “thing” inside them that begins to change their life around.  Everyone has that greatness and fortitude within.  It sometimes gets deeply buried when we repeatedly doubt our capabilities, believing external forces are greater than ourselves.  We forget we possess this strength.  However, once you break through that misconception you can begin turning your life around.  Learning to trust yourself and believing you can accomplish great things is pivotal in discovering your strength.

Anxiety and chronic stress can wear a person down.  They can cause uncomfortable feelings that can sap one’s energy, taking awaytheir initiative.  They can chip away at one’s self-confidence, leaving a person thinking they have little to no control over their feelings.

It’s important to remember during those times when you are experiencing anxiety symptoms or facing a stressful situation, that you can change your course.   You don’t have to keep living stressed and fearful no matter how long you’ve been that way.  It may take longer than you feel up to, and it may take hard work, but you can create a new narrative for yourself.

Keep faith in yourself and don’t give up.  Trust that you have what it takes to turn your anxious self into a capable, at peace individual.

It’s important to remember actions you take for which you are proud.  Think of something recently that turned out well, because you believed in yourself. Write it down and put it somewhere you can see often such as on a mirror, on a corkboard, or in a scrapbook.   It will become a valuable source of inspiration for you as you build upon it, working toward mastering anxiety and stress.


Thank you for checking out what Happy Mentality is all about.  As you read through, you’ll see how we coach all types of people, in all different stages of life, on ways they can achieve a greater state of wellness and consequently experience improved health. And much of this is done with a focus on achieving reduced anxiety and better stress management.

We all have stress, yet for some it can be incredibly overwhelming, at times even life altering.  No matter the degree of anxiety symptoms, we all have the potential to live more relaxed, to enjoy more peacefulness.

Different products and services are provided here, all with the goal of providing you with support, information and techniques you need to begin your path toward discovering a stronger, healthier, and more content you.

Some posts will be tips and tools for achieving improved health, while other entries will be intended to serve as sources of inspiration and motivation.

Read on and thanks for visiting!